"A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it."- Jerry Seinfeld
(Charlie put "her makeup on.")
So on Tuesday, I am taking my two-year-old on a 30+ hour trip across the world. Solo. In a confined space. Did I mention by myself? A two-year-old. 30+ hours.
Terrible two's. I mean something happens in the 2nd year of life that is so traumatic that there is a widely known term for two-year-olds and it involves the word "terrible." TERRIBLE.
Actually, I think it should be called the "Split personality twos." There are moments in my day with Charlie that she does something so wonderful that I look at her in all of her cuteness and pray "Oh please Lord let her never grow up." Like the other day when I told her I loved her and she squealed and said, "I am soooo happy." But to put this in perspective, this sweet exchange was proceeded by an epic tantrum in Target in which she glared at me and taunted "I want to hurt you mommy." Um, ok Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
So needless to say, I am a little panicky about traveling alone with my devious angel. I am even thinking of investing in one of these.
Yes, it is a child leash and I cannot get this scene from Modern Family out of my head:
But my dog/child sealed her fate today with a mad dash run around the busy Costco parking lot. My child may look like a leashed animal at the airport, but she will not: fall down the escalator, board a plane to Tahiti, or ride the baggage claim carrousel. Thank you and Amen.
(If you want to shoot a prayer up for my sanity on Tuesday, that would be great! We leave Atlanta at noon (Eastern time) the 3rd and arrive in Yaoundé, Cameroon at 5pm (Eastern time) on the 4th.)
If you speak Spanish, you are probably wondering why I am asking where the bathroom is and why I spelled baño incorrectly. What I am trying to say is, "Where is Banyo?" See it is a play on words. Get it? If you don't speak Spanish you are probably just confused. If you do speak Spanish, you are probably confused.
Now that we are all confused, let's get on with it then.
Banyo- *it is not a bathroom *it is a city-in Cameroon, Africa *it is where the Shinars are headed!
Call it optimism or denial, but until last week I was still holding out hope that we would be able to return to Gamboula. Josh has been there for almost 3 weeks now working on an extensive wiring/internet project. He confirmed what all of the news stories have been saying-at this time, CAR is not safe for foreign families with young children.
So, um new game plan! We are going to be joining two couples in Banyo in their Fulani ministries. Banyo is an exciting place as far as the Fulani are concerned- there is a growing group of Believers and the Fulani Believers even have a Christian radio station.
Now you know as much as we do about Banyo. Do you hear the crickets? Yeah, we don't know very much about our new home and that stresses me out a bit and when I say a bit, I mean a lot. A LOT. I am trying to practice that thing called trust. It should be an adventure to say the least!
Charlie and I leave next Tuesday the 3rd for Africa. We will stay in Yaoundé- the capital of Cameroon for a week to do supply shopping and wait for Josh and the Danforths with join us there before we take a small plane to Banyo.
Here are some images I found from Google (since I have not been to Banyo, I can't say for sure that these really are Banyo. I mean for all I know, they may be some where in Canada!)
I made it to CAR safely but my nerves were a little rattled. We had
just heard that the General who was keeping Gamboula peaceful(unlike
the entire rest of the country) was moved back to Bangui. In his
place an unknown new guy who had just taken office that day. I along
with 3 other missionaries drove the 11 hours from Yaoundé to Gamboula.
When we got to the border crossing we hid our vehicles on the
Cameroonian side. We took a taxi and filled a local ag truck with the
rest of our stuff. I along with Timothy rode in the back of
this pickup along with one of our local friends. We picked up a
plastic 10 ft piece of pipe to carry back to Gamboula for a fish pond
and mounted it to the truck, unfortunately much resembling a missile
launcher. Needless to say we didn't look all that friendly as we
crossed the border into CAR, especially me holding on to said pipe to
prevent from falling off the back of the truck over the bumpy roads.
The day was absolutely gorgeous though and as the wind blew through my
hair and the warm sun gently peeked through the trees, I felt totally
content with life. Even if things went horribly wrong at the border
with my bazooka-look-a-like, I was at peace. I was fully expecting to
be greeted by the 40 turbaned AK47 wielding "new government" that is
now normally present, but luckily we had just missed them. One nice,
armed border crossing gentleman let us in, not even checking our
passports. I did shake hands with the new guy but it was just a
pleasant "hello" and "how are you" as we passed through. We left a
few cokes with them for good-will.
I'm living in my old house now all alone.
The looting wasn't too bad
all things considered. They didn't get anything I hid in the attic and
all that I noticed was missing was the 2 laptops and the desktop. A
bunch of stuff was broken needlessly like our floor fans and all our
dishes are new but most of that was replaced by Aleta before I even
got here. New stuff is kind of nice really. Most everything that I
think is important is still here. I'm not sure about Lori or
Charlie's stuff though.
Things are a bit elevated here. We had a
mission wide meeting yesterday to discuss all the unpleasant details
of being in a torn country. Evacuation, where to run and hide,
rendezvous points when things settle, etc, etc. It is a little
nerve-racking to sleep but I'm so tired from all this work that I
don't have time to think about it too much before nighty-night.
Timothy and I along with Bonard and Fredoline have lunch
together each day. Even though I've lived here longer than Timothy
his Sango is at least 10 times better than mine. I have made
improvements though, I can tell already. It is lunch as usual with
Bobo and Fifi. Lots of laughing. Today I explained that I taught
high school kids how to dance. They were a little confused so I
showed them a video. They LOVED it. They got up and tried to do some
moves. They said "it is so fast!!" We talked about starting a
ballroom dancing class here but after a few minutes, the obvious
became clear...No way.
Yesterday Fredoline explained how she and
Bonard fled when the rebels broke into our house. It was pretty
frightening but she was able to hide in Charlie's room until she heard
them actually get in. Bonard had already fled to the Ag building but
kept an eye out for Fredoline. When she heard them enter she made a
run for it to the back door and got out. Bonard and she caught eyes
and Bonard said "Loro fadeso hio hio!" or "run now quickly quickly!".
She made a bolt for it and made it without being followed.
All the CAR people remember me and greet me enthusiastically. I never
knew so many people knew my name. They really love having me back but
immediately the where's Charlie question comes up...I can tell the
whole story in Sango now, I've told it so many times!
I got the internet working here after a "Feed Horn Assembly Cross
Polarization Adjustment", also known as hitting the satellite dish
with a hammer a few times and hacking some Linux root passwords. (Side
Note: just saw that 6 inch rat/squirrel thing in our living room
again. Just waved hello and went back to typing.) The internet is now
wired all the way to the furthest houses now after doing some
troubleshooting. Marus is helping me again full time. Today we dug a
trench to the chateau (when I say we, I mean Marus) to run a line for
our Gamboula 2 side antenna pointing towards our "tree relay" (working
on it). I'm working non-stop on getting all this tech stuff working.
A month seemed like a lot of time to get it done but I'm concerned
about having enough time already and I'm only a few days in! Tomorrow
we brave climbing the tree. We need to get some measurements then
hopefully by the end of the week we'll get it mounted.
-Joshua
I hate goodbyes and I am really bad at
them. I get awkward and clumsy or really sappy and blubberish-
especially if I will not see the person for a long time. So instead I
prefer to do the “pretend that it is not really goodbye for a long
time” thing- meaning I just say “Bye, see you later” like it is
no big deal all the while trying to hold in the blubbering, sappy,
awkward fest.
Although I hate goodbyes, I feel like I
do them often. The first of the monumental send offs was when I moved
from Georgia to Arizona. While it was hard to leave everyone in my
family, I particularly remember saying goodbye at the airport to my
little twin nieces, who at the time were 4 years old. With their
sweet cherub cheeks and baby curls, they fought over who would get to
hold Aunt Lori's hand. While they didn't grasp the meaning of the
separation, I was devastated that they would continue to change and
grow while I was gone. And they did. Every time I return to Georgia,
they are taller and so not babies anymore. In fact, those little
girls start high school tomorrow! A lot has changed since that
airport goodbye!
I also vividly remember my mom crying
when I moved to Arizona. I tear up just thinking about it. Actually,
my mom crying at the airport is a reoccurring image because I think
she has cried every time I left after a visit. Now that I am a mom, I
get it. If my daughter moved across the country, she would take my
heart with her. So now my heart grieves every time for the
grandparents that have to say goodbye to a certain adorable,
curly-haired princess.
The sadness I felt when I moved across
the country was multiplied when I moved across the world- across
the world! No longer was I only
a short plane ride away. I felt the sting of this goodbye all the way
to my core. It was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do.
Blubber fest for sure.
Yesterday,
I had another monumental goodbye. My husband of 9 years left for
another country without me- on a day when the whole world was on high
alert for a terrorist attack. Insert nervous sigh. But I managed to
keep it together as best I could at the airport when I dropped him
off. That was until from the backseat Charlie said, “Where daddy
go?” Me- “Daddy went bye bye on the plane.” Charlie- “No, I
want daddy. See daddy. Please. Please. Mommy please, see daddy. No
bye bye. Charlie go too. I want see daddy.” Insert choked up crying
mommy saying, “me too honey.”
I am
happy to say that Josh has arrived safely in Cameroon and already has
duties lined up at the Rainforest International School for the next
week while he waits for his ride to CAR.
We
would love if you could pray for safety for him over the next month
as he returns to CAR to complete several projects. Also that he would
have discernment as he decides whether it is safe for Charlie and me
to join him there in a month or whether we should go to Cameroon as a
family. Charlie and I have another monumental goodbye facing us in a
month's time as we go back to Africa too, please pray for meaningful
and memorable times with family this month. Thank you and
goodbye.
Now try to watch Kermit say goodbye to Miss Piggy without shedding at least one tear. I dare you.
Wow, our last blog was over 2 months ago! Sorry for the long blog silence! A lot has happened in the last 2 months:
We flew to Georgia and spent time with the Williams family and our friends.
Josh spent time with family in San Diego and went on a Shinar men hiking trip to Vancouver.
Charlie and I joined my sister and her family on vacation to Panama City, FL, then we relaxed and played in Georgia once again- lots of pool, playground, and water park fun with the cousins.
We all met up again and relaxed in Arizona with family and friends. Charlie has ben thoroughly entertained and spoiled by the grandparents.
We went to the McCoy family reunion (Josh's mom's family) in Colorado. We had a great time with family and enjoyed the chilly air!
We ate ourselves silly!
We shopped (ok, mostly me. Oh the Target and Wal-Mart trips).
We relaxed.
We waited for news from CAR.
We had great advice to take the first month of our return trip and just relax and recover from the evacuation from CAR. This would also give us a chance to see how things develop in CAR. Our mentors, the Danforths and a few other missionaries have returned to Gamboula. They have been there now for almost 2 months. Although they feel safe in our city, there is still some question about the stability of the rest of the country- too much uncertainty for a little one. For that reason, we have decided not to go back- right now. Instead we plan to go to Cameroon to work with Fulani there- hopefully for just a few months followed by a return to Gamboula. Currently, there are 2 locations we are researching and praying about. And yes- we still do not know where we are going even though we are scheduled to return to Africa August 3! Ah! I might be panicking a little! Despite the anxiety, we know that God continues to call us to the Fulani people and we long to be obedient to that calling- even with short notice!
We would appreciate your prayers over the next few days and weeks as we prepare to return to Africa. Please pray:
That we will have clarity and peace about what city we should serve.
For ease with documentation and logistics of moving back overseas.
For safe and easy travel.
For our families as we say goodbye and they go through Charlie withdrawals.
For continued peace in CAR and safety for our friends there.
That we may be able to return there in a few months and safety in whatever city we reside.
Last week, 5 members of our Gamboula team returned to the Cameroon/Central African Republic border. They met with several leaders from Gamboula that crossed the border to report on the situation in town. The reports were good. They said Gamboula was peaceful and even encouraged the group to cross the border to visit, which they did. The team reported that everything looked and felt normal despite a few new government officials from the Seleka group that apparently were very cordial and professional. The highest official is a 31 year old gentleman that has the respect of Seleka and the community. A lot of the peace in Gamboula has been credited to him. All of the workers from the women selling produce on the side of the road to the nurses and shop owners have returned to their jobs. Schools have also resumed. It appears that Gamboula has remained relatively unscathed during the rebellion. We also learned that the looting of our houses was not as bad as first thought. Apparently some of our neighbors video taped the looting and others wrote down names of those looting. Some teenagers even tackled some looters and recovered items. Days later, some of our neighbors went to the houses of those they knew were involved and recovered even more items. Our silverware was found in the Garden of Eden! Until we return and see for us we will not really know the extent of what was taken. Our team was warmly welcomed and many asked for us all to return. Over all the trip was a great success. It was healing, meaningful, and a wonderful chance to encourage our friends. We also learned that our house helps' daughter had a baby girl that they named "Lori" now all 3 Shinars have a name-sake in Africa!
The state of Gamboula is remarkable considering the rest of the country is still in unrest with continued looting, violence, and instability. Just 2 hours north of Gamboula, anarchy remains. Hospitals and schools are not functioning in the capital and poachers are killing elephants for ivory in the parts of the country. We pray that peace remains in Gamboula and spreads throughout CAR.
As for us, we will return home on Tuesday for a few months for rest and healing. We pray that we will be able to return to Gamboula. We are also praying about other options in Cameroon if we are unable. We would appreciate your prayers for easy travel and that we will be healthy- all of us have been sick today! Please also pray for our friends in CAR and for the country that is so dear to our hearts.
Since ending our vacation in Kribi, we have been staying in Yaounde- the capital of Cameroon. Josh has been helping out at the Rainforest International School (a school for missionary kids, expat children, and some local kids as well). He has been using his geeky giftings in their IT department. He has also managed to find a way to serve God through swing dancing. He is assisting the gym teaching with the dancing module. He has been having a blast.
Charlie and I have been hanging out. We live next to a family with 3 small children that Charlotte adores. Every morning she says, “Go play friends!” And they have! There are 3 playgrounds close to us that we frequent and Wycliffe Associates has an amazing library for Mks- there is even a story time. We have also been learning to live “the African city life” of on and off water and electricity. And I have been learning how to survive a 2 year old whose favorite phrase is “no way!”
We get news everyday from CAR- some good, but most not so great. It looks like Gamboula is relatively safe and quiet now, but Bangui the capital is still a mess. Our hopes of a quick return have been dashed. We are hoping that things will turn around in a few months.
In the meantime, we have received wise council that the best thing for us to do now is to return to the States for a short time of rest and recuperation during which we will continue to pray for CAR, but also any other open doors through which God may lead. We will visit family and friends for a month in Georgia and another in Arizona before returning to Cameroon in August. (We are leaving Cameroon May 14).
We still feel God calling us to Africa and continue to have a heart for our Fulani brothers and sisters. This brief time home does not reflect a change in our calling, desire, or mission. We just feel we need to regroup, repair, and restrategize!
We appreciate your ongoing prayers for our family as we travel and also for our friends in CAR.
